Tales of the Human Walrus by Peter “The Mordo” Juan

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Aftermath…

October 24, 2007

While I've been thankfully free from the shackles of the debilitating writer's block that plagued me for months, I have opted to keep mum about much of the things that kept this side of the blogosphere buzzing with activity, from the drama of that was the UAAP Basketball championship to the comedy that the Desperate Housewives brouhaha turned out to be. To be honest, I've been preoccupied by the exciting developments we've been cooking up for all the bloggers here on I.PH and I have been more than content working behind the scenes, hoping that I might, in my own little way, contribute something of importance to the blogging community.

Then Glorietta happened. I followed it in the news, discussed it with friends and felt just as bad about it as most people. However, I was not compelled enough to write anything about it. Until now. I came across this email, which was posted in The Man Blog forums of all places,which knocked me out of my sweet comfortable apathy and compelled me enough to act. The first time I read it, it broke my heart.

It was written by a man named Carlo Cruz, who most of you have probably heard of by now as he's been interviewed in the papers, radio as well as TV. I do not know Carlo myself but he is the friend of the wife of a good friend of mine and while that might seem like nothing to some, it drove hard the point just how closely this hit to home. Nothing I could write would bear the same weight as Carlo's email, so instead, I am posting the entire thing here.

Good day everyone,

I wish I were writing under different circumstances.

I would like to inform you that my wife Leslie Cruz
was part of the casualties in the Glorietta 2 Mall
bombing in Makati City, Philippines. She was supposed
to have a minor out patient surgery at Makati Medical
Center at 230pm.

I had taken a leave from work to accompany her there.
We dropped off our daughter, Amber, at my parents
place in QC to babysit at around 10am. We then
proceeded to Makati and was there at 1230pm. Since she
had been fasting in preparation for her procedure, she
wanted to move ar ound and listen to some music while I
grabbed a bite to eat. We parked at the basement of
Park Square 2, and headed for the Glorietta 2
entrance. We parted at the top of the escalator, she
turned right towards Filbar's while I went left
towards the restaurants. That was the last time I
would see her.

Around 120pm, she had called me so that we can meet at
the Glorietta 2 exit just in time to make her
appointment. As I made my way there from Glorietta 1
through the connecting hallways, and was about to turn
the corner, I heard 2 deep thumps and the shock-wave
from the blast hit me. At that moment my heart dropped
as I knew that the origin of the blast came from the
same place where we were supposed to meet. I tried
getting to where my wife was, but the dust was too
much and it was as if I was staring at a white wall.

I still tried to convince myself that she was able to
make it out, and that after ringing her mobile without
a response only meant that she dropped it in the
confusion. After 6 hours of searching from Makati Med.
to Ospital ng Makati, the blast site, and back again
to MMC - with the help of all the people I could get
hold of, that I was able to get confirmation in what
the state of my wife was.

My Dad and Uncle signaled me in from the ER of MMC. My
Uncle (who's a doctor) asked me to describe Leslie's
appearance to another group of doctors. I saw in the
eyes of one that the description made sense. Instead
of confirming it to me, they huddled together, then
brought me to a small examination room. It was only
through a digital camera that I was able to confirm
(and deny) that she was indeed gone.

I have so many regrets. I should have met her sooner.
I should have ran instead of a brisk walk. I should
have not chose to park where I did. I should have
braved the dust and went in the blast site. I should
have …

Today's the 4th day. It is still terribly difficult to
breathe, let alone wake up realizing that your source
of strength, your best friend doesn't lie beside you
on your bed. That my deepest worry is when Amber
starts asking for her Mama.

I am glad that Amber's too young to understand the
loss and pain. In time I would like to tell her the
details of how her mother died, but more importantly I
would like to raise her as how her mother lived - a
loving person, strong willed, decisive, caring, and
nurturing. She has always cared for her family and
friends, and sacrfied her career for being a full time
mom and home maker.

As with all couples we had our ups and downs - none of
which I regret not going through. The sweet is never
as sweet without the sour. For almost 4 years of
marriage, we've finally hit our balance in life only
to be taken away in an instant. I have no regrets
about our marriage. She has loved me and Amber beyond
her capacity. I will always love her.

It is my first time to write to egroup as I've lurked
and watched emails being sent to and fro. All I want
now is that for each of the couples here is to cherish
each moment that we spend with our loved ones. Pretty
simple to say, very easy to take for granted.

Thank you all for the prayers. I would still like to
ask you to please include Leslie in them until her
40th day so that the path to God's kingdom is well lit
and she is no longer in the dark.

Sincerely,

Carlo Cruz

Carlo, I am deeply saddened by your loss. Leslie has my prayers and so do you and the rest of your family.

Posted by peterjuan at 11:10 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

“the greatest irony of love is letting go when you need to hold on and holding on when you need to let go. . take pleasure in life while you still can. live it to the fullest..”

Posted by trish at October 25, 2007, 8:58 pm

Amen to that Trish. Life is fragile. We should never forget that. We should never take for granted the people that we love.

Posted by Adam Mordo at October 26, 2007, 9:02 am

naiyak ako dito.

i wrote a news item about the loved ones the victims’ left behind. there was an interview of carlo cruz. pinipigilan niya yung sarili niyang umiyak. it was a heartbreaking sight.

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Who I am

Hi. I'm Adam Mordo, the Human Walrus. As such, I have a natural affinity for water. Needless to say, I love the ocean and I'm crazy about the beach! Just give me sand, surf and beautiful weather and I'm happy as a clam. I'm a frustrated writer, an amateur photographer, a wannabe surfer and washed up fencer. I'm a hard worker (at least my boss thinks so) a good friend (as my friends would say...well I made them say that but...) and a business mogul in training (mwehehehe). I believe that normalcy is boring but I accept that it is a neccesary evil. I believe that friendship is stronger than distance, that fact is stranger than fiction and that imagination is more powerful than knowledge. I believe that happiness is, more than anything else, a choice. And as cheesy as it may sound, I still believe that love conquers all.